If Mama Isn’t Happy
When you finally get that call and pack up for the academy, do not forget the ones who stood by and encouraged
you along the way. Do not forget those who were your sounding board or stayed up with you at night trying to figure
out how you could get a badge. Firefighters already have a higher divorce rate than many other occupations. You do
not want the additional stress of being a rookie compounded by a divorce.
Here is a rule to follow – If momma isn’t happy, nobody is happy.
I receive calls regularly from girlfriends and fiancées who are looking for a ring and a date. But their guy tells them
he can’t commit until he gets a badge. Those that are married test the relationships especially when they get into the
academy and go through probation.
As a retired firefighter, I know the drill. When working to get the badge, you don’t think about much else. Your
training center may not be close to home, so you only get home once a week at best. When you are home, all you do
is study and prepare. As a result, your family feels ignored or in your way. Tensions rise and typically tempers flare.
It is a stressful time for all members of your inner world – AKA – your family and support system.
Here is what we want to share with our families of recruits out there.
Preparing to be a firefighter is one of the most demanding careers out there. Candidates must pass all segments of
the program, or they will be out. – YES. I said OUT! This pressure continues through probation.
You have stood by your candidate. Helped as best as you can. Picked up the slack. You have filled in the gaps. We
know this is a difficult time for everyone in your candidate’s life. And, we thank you!
Rest assured that the attitude your firefighter candidate has is temporary and is NOT about you or your family. It’s
about the pressure to get their dream job as a firefighter. The distraction you are sensing is the focus and dedication
needed to get the badge. Isn’t that the whole point?
Nothing counts ’til you have the badge . . . Nothing!
Fire Captain Bob
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